My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
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