I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
'valentine' just autocorrected to 'cake robe' in my phone
I think that summarizes my life up pretty accurately
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Randomize
