But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
I thought you'd have died of alcohol poisoning years ago! How'd you get my number?
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
Randomize
