If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
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