i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
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i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
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