My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
I met my future husband in an elevator. Think Hispanic version of Dr. Bunsen Honeydew from the Muppets, but with eyes like Michael Fassbender.
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
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