You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
Dude, it's the frankincense and myrrh soap. Smelling like baby Jesus will get you laid.
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
Randomize
