I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
So how do you explain to your boss that Siri called him mid sex?
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
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