There was a ginger baby in the car next to me. I almost totaled my car into the center divide.
I tried to assassinate the ginger baby
My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
What kind of terrible faithless God would allow vodka and one ply toilet paper to coexist?
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
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