i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
Why is there a wet sock in my garbage? Why did I chug so much red wine? Why was someone signing into my iCloud account at 4 am in China? Why do I do self-destructive reckless things? So many questions.
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
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