i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
listen if there's one thing I'm asking of you tonight is that you buy me a cow for my farmville.
Tell me you're stoned. It's 2:40am.
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
I love that your last three texts to me were "Drunk." "Getting laid." "In the hospital."
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
Randomize
