My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
Randomize
