She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
19 Of The Creepiest (Most Inexplicable) Things People Experienced
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
It's like, "you literally have no idea who i am but i definitely slept with your brother in your bed."
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
We woke up today with 24 donuts, a tie, two jugs of vodka that we traded an extra sandwich for, and a british boy