Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
I am far too drunk to be making a tuna melt . There's blood EVERYWHERE.
how was your night?
well, i just purchased 'sorry for being a drunk whore' cupcakes. how do you think my night was?
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
Randomize