That chick was all over your bacon last night, grinding on you, I thought you were going to bang her in the club
Dude it was a lap dance
How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
Whoever had sex in my bed during the party last night left a glow in the dark condom on my floor. I'm not even mad anymore, I just want to know who it is so they can tell me where to get one.
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
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