Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
i told him my stretch marks were scars from a jellyfish sting........he totally bought it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
Randomize