We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
He decided not to draw dicks on my face when I passed out because he was afraid I'd retaliate and superglue his dick to his stomach....he knows me too well.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
You're going to literally shit your fucking unholy pants when Jesus rides in with his dual light-sabers on his velociraptor and cleaves you in half.
Randomize
