Just brushed my teeth...forgot we used this toothbrush in bed last night.
I have demons in me.
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
She made me walk a straight line to prove i was sober enough to help carry you to the car
Knowing you it was perfect out of spite. Like. A line straighter than YOU
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
Randomize
