I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
When you went through airport security you asked if the could check if a baby was in there. That drunk.
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
I literally used, "MY VAGINA IS TOO FANTASTIC FOR HIM TO STAY GAY" as a valid argument for attempting to fuck my gay friend.
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
Randomize
