eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
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