Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
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