no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread.
This is why you don't have nice things.
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
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