The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
Randomize
