'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
mom asked me why i'm never sober at family events, i told her i learned it from her.
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
