The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
Randomize
