If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
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