im having a threesome with these popsicles
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
Of course I have a pirate flag
It's a good thing my liver is flexible because a lesser man would be dead
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
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