How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
Randomize
