what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
He gave me an ambien and I woke up with a raw chicken bone in my purse. I have no idea why but I hope I put it in his butt
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