i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
Randomize
