my dad just secretly slid me a nugg in front of my mom. remind me why I moved away for college??
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
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She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
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It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
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