Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
Hypothetically speaking how does one remove a lamp that they hypothetically superglued to the ceiling?
Acetone nail polish remover, and you lied about studying last night didn't you?
Oh definitely.
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
Randomize
