he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
Randomize
