I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
my grandma just informed me that patrick swayze used to babysit my dads cousins why wasn't i informed of this early...like when i was obsessed with dirty dancing!
I'm pissed I'm finding this out at 24 bc i could have used this material to make friends
ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?
I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
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