You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
right as i was about to introduce them she goes "old fuck buddy, meet new fuck buddy."
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
Randomize
