wrigley field is MILF paradise
do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
My mom just bought me $200 worth of booze on the condition that I promise I won't have to go to rehab eventually
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
I hate it when fuck holes buy me drinks at the bar. You don't know my order. You don't know me. You don't know where I've been. You don't know my life.
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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