Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
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