I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
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