we have officially lost it.
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
Me and your penis are best friends. You don't know it, but I whisper my secrets whenever I give you blowjobs. We even have a secret handshake. We can't be separated from each other. We just can't.
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
I’d clean the kitchen before making food. Mark “rang in the New Year” with some rando in there last night
Randomize
