I'm going to save the lime from my McDonald's salad to use in my Corona later tonight.
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
Randomize
