Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
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