Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
All I do lately is eat steak, drink warm beer, watch porn, and avoid booty calls when I'm too lazy to take a shower. I think the apocalypse turned me into a dude.
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
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