there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
Randomize
