erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
Randomize
