I can't watch pbs sober anymore
I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
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