Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
you're like a bully in the Christmas story
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
You passed out in your dogs bed and you only willingly woke up because I told there was a bottle of vodka and a snickers bar waiting for you upstairs
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
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