brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
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