On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
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I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
So a list of things I should stay away from bringing up at dinner with your fiance tonight?
1) you and I went to a strip club 2) i saw you topless at said strip club 3) i cried when we watched the Real World
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
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OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
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