We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
Do you have Pokemon Go yet? I just caught a Clefairy on my walk of shame and feel way better about myself.
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
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