As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
I went to the gynecologist and they said, "you're the most fun person we've ever had," and i thought, "that's exactly why i'm here!"
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
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