pick me up and take me to a bathroom i have to shit
no
the bathroom is right infront of the beerpong table
im sorry you werent invited but you live 2 blocks away PLEASE
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
Randomize
